Sinope's Fiction: More Placid Stars

Title: More Placid Stars
Author: Sinope at (no spam!) gmail dot com
Rating: PG
Pairing: Snape/Lupin
Summary: Severus and Remus grow old at Hogwarts; time passes, seeds blossom, and change becomes difficult.
Author's notes: This fic is set in an AU of mine. After Voldemort was destroyed, the wizarding world secluded itself, gathering together all magical folk and permanently separating their island from the Muggle world. Wizards could choose to lose their magic and live as Muggles or to stay on the island, but if they left, they couldn't come back.
Disclaimer: This is an unofficial fan work. No profit was made; no ownership is implied.

"Severus." The Potions Master looked up to see Remus watching him, a teacup poised between mouth and saucer. "Nymphadora asked me today to marry her."

Severus's eyes returned to his herbological text. "Ah. Did you consent?"

"Not yet," Remus said, then took a sip of tea, the liquid surface catching glints of firelight. "It's a wise choice. She's a powerful witch of childbearing age, and Lord knows that we need more children on the Island. She'd make a good mother, I think."

"Why not, then?"

Remus set down his tea on one of the Staff Room's tables. "She said she'd asked you first - your magical lineage is stronger than mine. Why'd you turn her down?"

"I have no desire for her disgusting cheerfulness in my presence, let alone my bed," Severus said. Remus smiled slightly. "Her sudden maternal desires, 'wizarding duty' or not, are hardly my concern."

"Neither of us are getting any younger, Severus, and Hermione's history lessons will be scant legacy."

Severus snorted in amusement. "Paint a portrait of yourself, if you want a legacy. The wizarding world is dying in a self-imposed prison, whatever the bloody Prophet says, and I see no need to add one more brat to the remnants witnessing its inevitable collapse."

"If that's how you responded, I can see why Nymphadora turned to me," Remus said, and his smile glimmered at the edges of his lips. He took another sip of tea. "She's a good woman, you know. It really would mean a lot if I -"

"Remus." Severus set down his text and looked straight at the other man; around them, the late-night silence hung as heavy as velvet. "Why are you bothering to justify yourself to me?"

Remus broke the gaze first, then shook his head slightly and drained the rest of his tea in one long draught. He stood up briskly. "I'd best get to bed. Good night, Severus."

"Good night." In Remus's wake, the firelight flickered red and gold on the white strands lacing Severus's hair.

Summer had already begun to fade into autumn, and a cold wind raked through Severus's hair as he stirred his potion, standing aside to allow it to soak up the near-full moonlight. The sky above the Astronomy Tower spun with blinded satellites; countless pinpricks of light tumbled between the constellations, obscuring the more placid stars.

"I don't know how I could bear to be a Muggle," Remus said, and Severus looked up sharply at the intruder, less bothered than he liked to admit. "Every second I stepped outside, I'd have countless celestial eyes watching me, documenting my every movement for God knows who."

Severus shrugged, gave his potion one last stir, then let it rest in the silvery light and turned to Remus. "You prefer imprisonment, then? An island of safety, impregnable and inescapable?"

Brushing a few strands of hair out of his eyes, Remus looked at Severus, but said nothing.

"You have the choice to leave," Severus said eventually. "I've never understood why you don't take it."

"It's not really a choice, though, is it? Everything about me - my magic, my friends, my job, even the wolf inside - all of it would be taken away." More quietly, he said, "I'd be alone."

Severus let out a mild hrmph. "If you expect me to indulge your sentimental self-pity, you've come to the wrong place."

"No, Severus," Remus said, and a smile transformed his face. "I know better than that. But I think you know what I mean. When's the last time you left Hogwarts for more than a week? You've had no need to stay and teach, ever since Voldemort and Dumbledore died, and I know you've no great love for students."

"I stay because I am . . . accustomed to this place. There's no need for a disruption in my activities."

"Exactly." Remus gave him another disquietingly knowing smile.

Severus turned away intentionally, trying to focus on the setting moon. Silence passed between them for a few minutes, and, though Severus avoided looking directly at the other man, he could feel his presence as an undercurrent of prickling in his skin. When he finally turned back to Remus, he found him closer than he'd expected, close enough to touch.

"Please don't," Severus said, in a voice quiet and breakable.

"All right," said Remus. The lines on his face, Severus noticed suddenly, were no longer just scars.

The evening had waxed late, and even Hermione had left the staff room, arms full of lesson plans, when Remus arrived.

"And how is Miss Tonks doing?" Severus asked, slightly waspishly.

"She's quite well, thank you, and you've no need to take that tone with me." Remus paused. "How'd you know I was talking to her, anyway?"

Severus snorted. "You're smiling. You always smile like that when you've talked to her. I'm not blind, whatever you may think."

"I'm sorry," Remus said, wincing slightly. "I . . . I suppose I never thought you cared for smiles."

"I don't," Severus said, emphatically. He returned to his lesson plans for a few moments, then added, without looking up, "You really ought to marry her."

"Oh?"

"It would . . . do you good to have a real family. A wife, children, all that nonsense."

Remus raised an eyebrow mildly, then walked across the room to seat himself in the chair next to Severus. After a glance at the door, he settled himself into the unfortunately rigid cushions. "For your information, I'm quite content as I am. Besides, it's no longer an option."

"Why not?"

"I already turned her down." Remus looked thoughtfully at the crackling fire. "She was understanding, if a bit disappointed. By now she's making her preparations to leave the Island and join her parents. Nymphadora had always missed them, anyway."

"Ah." Severus set down his reading and watched Remus watching the flames, then traced his gaze downward to look at Remus's hands as they rested on his chair. He'd always admired those hands, though he'd have snogged a Thestral before admitting it. They matched his own: elongated and clever, skin translucently thin over sharp bones. Capable hands.

Severus looked up sharply when he realized that Remus, no longer watching the fire, was calmly observing him. After an awkward moment of meeting the other man's gaze, he looked away. "Remus. I'm being honest with you, Merlin knows why. If you don't leave this castle soon, start a new life on your own, then you never will."

A smile touched Remus's face this time, more wistful than the one he'd worn earlier. "Severus. Why do you think that I would ever want to leave?"

He placed his hand on Severus's hand, and only when their fingers had interlaced could Severus feel how badly Remus was trembling. Severus let their hands clasp each other and squeezed the fingers tight. "All right," he said.

finis.